Is your girlfriend hot?

That has to be the stupidest thing I've ever been asked in my life. This is what some rocket scientist asked me last night when I happened to mention something about seeing a girl later.

Is my girlfriend hot?

"No, she's not. She's a dog. We're not physical because she's crippled and a leper, and the conversation isn't good because she had her mouth sewn shut my the Nazi's and now she refuses to talk to anyone, at all. She also likes to rub rotten tomatoes all over her body whenever someone says the phrase "How about that?", just because she can. Oh, and sometimes, just sometimes, she rubs her face wih a cheese grater to feel better about her 'situation'.

Is my girlfriend hot? Fuck off. Who's isn't?