A Winning Formula

I'm normally not one to reveal my trade secrets, but seeing as I've used this for the past few weeks, I think it's time for me to share it with the world, while I pursue to master new ideas.

"The secret?" you ask. Yes, the secret of getting your partner to climax, perhaps more than once, in under ten minutes.

Some people might think I'm crazy. "Only ten minutes?" you would ask, "that's too short. I want it to last longer than that." With my formula, it feels like a lifetime.

Here's how it goes:

Get your music player of choice into the room, make sure it's loud. By loud I mean really loud, I'll explain why later. Now, make sure you have 'Angel' by Sarah McLachlan and 'Run' by Snow Patrol written on a disc, or in a separate playlist in your iTunes, WinAmp, whatever.

Get that ready. Shit. Get it ready a week before you know you're getting any action, 'cos when it happens you don't want to be fart-arse-ing around trying to 'set the mood', it should be set in advance.

Now, when you and your partner decide it's time for action, start the foreplay. Let it go on until you're both very naked and very aroused. Then press play. 'Angel' is a great track for slow, sensual foreplay. Everyone knows it, so you know where the highs and lows are, and it's familiar so it makes foreplay a lot easier.

The best music player would be a laptop, because you can fade tracks between each other rather than waiting for a track to start after the previous one finished, but if a CD player is all you have, don't worry, it'll still work.

Now, when 'Run' starts, that's when you go for gold. Foreplay stops, and you spring into action. Make sure you know the song.

Learn it.
Dream it.
Live it.

Because when it starts, you want to know every high, every low, every change of pace, because that's how you are going to perform. You're going to perform like the band is inside of you, and you're orchestrating every word, every note, every little drumbeat.

The funny thing is, your partner will actually feel that way. You will be the master of the music, as well as the master of the bedroom. And it's not just for guys, the ladies can do it too. As long as you're in control, it'll be a night never forgotten.

And I repeat, make it loud, extra loud, because your moans, screams and bursts of elation will be louder (because you're not worried about anyone hearing).

By the end of the most powerful ten minutes of your life, I can guarantee a huge orgasm, and a shared cigarette.

7 women. 7 exact same results.

Go forth and try it, please. And let me know if it works for you. I'm off to find the next big thing, I love the weekend.