The sounds of silence

Top arb news of late:

Art Garfunkel bust for marijuana, again!

Michelle Pfeiffer's car was stolen in London while filming.

Japanese doctor punches patient during surgery.

Wizard of Oz ruby slippers stolen.

Charlize Theron, (Laurian will enjoy this,) to guest star in Fox's Arrested Development.

London firefighter wins World Bog Snorkelling Championships.

Click pics for links.

What happened to "Hi, I'm jimmmer"?

Pick up lines. What a joke.

Porkchop posted this beaut used on her. I say terrible! Do girls actually go for lines like that? I've only ever used a pick up line once, because I was really really drunk, and it didn't work. The line?

You see my friend over there? He wants to know if you think I'm cute.

She giggled, then stared at me. I turned and walked away.

Natalie Portman for the day

Isn't she just fantastic?

:: sigh ::

A Chinese proverb for clients

"The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it."

History repeated

1981
Prince Charles got married
Liverpool crowned Champions of Europe
Pope died

2005
Prince Charles got married
Liverpool crowned Champions of Europe
Pope died

I bet the new Pope is dreading ol' Charlie's next fling!

Can you smell that, dear?

An old geezer in Germany left his wife to rot in the TV lounge,

"...the two had spent their happiest times together in front of the TV set and he could not bear to part with her."

Anybody else hear that Twilight Zone music playing in the background?

Natalie Portman for the day

A predicament

Laurian at Peas on toast is in a bit of a pickle. She says that if she left her job now (after a 3 month probation period) and went to another, that it would look bad on her resume. I have to disagree.

Long gone are the days of getting a job and keeping it until you retire. What companies are looking for nowadays are people with experience. Experience. Let's look at the word:

Experience
Active participation in events or activities, leading to the accumulation of knowledge or skill

Ok. So an accumulation of knowledge or skill.

Look at a guy who's had the same job for twenty years, and a guy who's had twenty jobs in twenty years. Who has more experience? The second guy. I'd say he has twenty times more experience! Why? Because the first guy, you could say, has had one year of experience, twenty times over!

Do you see where I'm getting at? So Laurian, spread your wings and fly, because the more people you meet, and the more ways-of-doing-things you're exposed to, the better your chances are to make something great, or greater, of yourself.

Multiple choice

It's Saturday night and I'm sitting at a club, probably on my fifth beer. This absolute hottie in a mini skirt (with stems that went for miles) sits across from me, and without a word shows me she has no underwear on. She then motions with her head for me to follow her to the bathroom.


Did I:

a) Consider this an insult because I am a gentleman and ignore her offer?
b) Start following her, then chicken out just as she rounded the corner?
c) Have my eyes mesmerised by those beautifully tanned legs, follow her to the bathroom and get absolutely hammered for the first time in the ladies bathrooms?

The Official Interview Game

So I jumped on the bandwagon and asked pinksandroses to interview me. This is what she sent:

The Official Interview Game Rules:
1. If you want to participate, leave a comment below saying interview me.
2. I will respond by asking you five questions - each person's will be different.
3. You will update your journal/blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview others in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Here are your five questions:
1) Which is worse?
The guy next to you on a plane snoring
The baby next to you on a plane crying

2) What is one thing that you wish you could tell your boss but can't?

3) NYNC or Backstreet Boys

4) If you could get rid of the celebrities who would they be?

5) Please attribute a category to each of the following: Shag, Marry, or Throw off a cliff- Hillary Duff, Lindsey Lohan, Mary-Kate Olsen
-haha sorry I was reading an article about teen idols

My answers:

1. Worse: The guy sitting next to me on the plane snoring.

2. I'm my own boss, but I'd tell most of clients that they hire me because I'm a professional at what I do, and if they could do what I do then they'd do it themselves! Damnit!

3. I'm guessing it was supposed to be 'NSYNC', and that would be my answer.
:: runs to bathroom to vomit, can't believe what he just typed ::

4. I'd get rid of Nick Nolte, 'Janice' from Friends and Clint Eastwood.

5. What a toughie! Shag: Lindsey Lohan, Marry: Hillary Duff, Throw off the highest cliff in the world: Mary-Kate Olsen

Mercedes has a new image

Pic stolen from Squishi

Bikini of the day

Years of experience have taught me one thing: The journey can be much more fun than the destination.

Which is why I've posted these two 'tease' pics. A naked bum would just be a naked bum, but half, nay, a quarter of a bum leaves you guessing and aching to know what the rest looks like.

Yay for extremely sexy bums.

Bloggers

During our time spent starting Upside Your Head and perusing all sorts of blogs, I've come to realise that there are three different types of bloggers:

1. The Office Blogger
This blogger doesn't work too much, and leeches off the company bandwidth for his/her personal blogging pleasure. Posts are random, and commenting on his/her own blog, as well as other blogs is an all-day occurrence.

2. The Home Blogger
Late at night, when the family have closed their eyes and gone to bed, the Home Blogger boots up his/her home machine, browses through all his/her favourite blogs, commenting where applicable, and then posts on his/her own blog, eagerly awaiting any comments they might find the following evening.

3. The Anytime Blogger
This is the greatest of all bloggers. He/she posts whenever necessary. Work time, play time, evening time, and all his/her posts have a special meaning to them. Commenting on his/her own blog is random, commenting on other blogs is more important. This blogger should be praised for doing what they love, whenever they like.

Which kind of blogger are you?

After all the shit in London

The queen's fighting back!

NOW I want a monkey!

Natalie Portman

...in a bikini. Can you get any better than that?

Wait, yes you can.

Bikini of the day

What a fine use of cloth this is. Stumbled across this fine specimen earlier today, and I just couldn't stop.

I then found this one (which I must say is also good work, considering how little cloth they had to work with)


Then I found this one, and this one, just cos I had some time on my hands.

Water

Such a simple thing, really.

Clean, clear, pure.

But not when used in a way not right for said glass of water, mother nature's juice for the living.

This glass of goodness, a natural thing, was the instigator of another natural thing, getting this man shagged like never before. This is the story:

I was at a club on the weekend, standing at the bar, minding my own business, when this belter of a bird standing next to me asks the barman for a glass of water. He ignores her, because he's an arrogant prick, and asks me what I'd like. "A beer," I said, "and a glass." When the two items arrived I grabbed a jug of water on the bar counter, poured the princess a glass of water, and got nailed an hour later in what I gathered was her mate's car.

Water. Such a simple thing, really.